Wednesday, November 4, 2015

How to use Halloween to your advantage... the Elete Parent

Here is a little tip for all of the rookies out there... mind you if you are one of those parents that freaks out and is always trying to control everything THIS WILL NOT WORK FOR YOU.  I'm sorry you have already lost command and showed too many weaknesses for this exercise.

Basically:

When the kids do the "don't eat my Halloween candy" bit,  tell them to go upstairs or to another room.  Now call them back in. At this time pull out some high end chocolate (that you have ready of course), and give them a taste.  Tell them "Kids this is My private candy stash"... "now, why would I eat your crappy plastic wrapped garbage when i can stay with my own far superior private stash?".  Now as they freeze in wonderment staring at you start counting steamboats and see if you can make it past 14,  the legendary record.

The idea that you have a private stash of high end candy just bends their minds, and when they ask where it is make sure to tell them it is well hidden and they will never find it... cause they just don't have what it takes...  And then go out and garden for a while... obviously make sure there is no Candy in the house, because they will find it tearing the place apart on the heels of this new insane fact.  But they find nothing... and in the end, although it may be a tad bit hostile, they have an admiration for you.  In their heads they are saying "this guy has an awesome perfectly hidden stash of ace candy... that's like my dream... i need to be like him... i will befriend him... see what makes this guy tick... he will show me the way even if he tries not to as i become a fluid cog in the machine".

It's great, they become so obsessed with finding your imaginary stash, you are free to raid theirs... which of course you have to do as a matter of principle after being directly told not to do so.  These are necessary dues for kids to pay, and pay hard... every couple of weeks afterward cruise through their personal space munching on a nice piece of chocolate. It will remind them of what is not there... which in a psychological way is the distilled key humanity illusion problem we have going on right now... the lessons are endless.

It started out that the idea is to take the scam to them... think hockey and the idea of a good defense as being a strong offense.  Your defense is good when you are playing at the other end of the rink... use the full sheet.. don't sit in the net and get shelled.  But really like in Hockey once you start doing one thing right it opens a bunch of opportunities for more growth.

So that is your tip for the day. Use it or lose it.